The Sit-Down Comedian

by Tejas Nair

Last week I experienced a question in my mind which wouldn’t answer itself. I talked to some of my associates and the outcome was like-minded. The question is “When a professor/teacher/tutor/elder asks you something while you are sitting somewhere, how would you react?”

I will use the word teachers out of the lot. Teachers are teachers and they react inversely to the theme of the subject they teach. Mostly. For example, my Mathematics (Random Signal Analysis) teacher is so calm, she asked me a question while I was chatting with my partner during her lecture. I stood up, driven by the impulse and started blabbering. She asked me to sit and answer. I answered wrong before she gave me a wry smile. And the question passed on to three other students before she answered it herself with sadness. That question was “If the probability of getting number 2 in a die is 1/6, then what was my first salary as a teacher?”


Teacher (Photo credit: tim ellis)

Come next period and my Microprocessor & Microcontroller teacher entered our classroom for the first time. After some good pleasantries, he wanted to know our names. So he started with me so that I could analyze and write this blogpost  a week later.

My partner & I had completed babbling about how & why wardrobe malfunction never happens at college level. I took offence when he branded me a pervert at the end of RSA lecture. As I was concentrating at what our teacher was saying, upon the gesture, I started, “Myself Tej….” He interrupted and asked me to stand up. “The pervert has set a sight on piglet’s cleavage,” came from my partner. Without paying heed, I started again because I was nervous “Myself Tejas Nair!” Piglet is an epithet we had given to a hottie of our classroom due to her face & physique and that day she had it all covered.

Now, the question being specific, I took more offence from my M&M teacher than I took from my partner and over that, none of them had the courtesy to tell me “No offence!”

Now, two similar situations and different actions & understandings. Wow!

So the unanimous answer to how to react during such events is that YOU STAND UP first and then reveal that you are suffering from Asperger’s. It shows respect to the questioner and will also make you look wiser even if your answer/reply is wrong/inappropriate. Sitting and answering definitely has a negative effect which was evident when the following day my M&M teacher publicized about how I said ‘H’ was also a hexadecimal number. No matter, what the question is or whoever the question comes from, standing up and answering will get you one step further unless it’s a viva you are answering in. The actual question is “If the probability of this writer having dated is 1/2, then what is the probability that he is a pervert?” I love Mathematics, by the way.

NOTE: The sentences involving the word “pervert” is definitely used for rhetoric furnishing of the post and is totally invented. But, piglet IS sexy.